Inheritance of Hope

Dear Caleb,

My last letter was just an emotional  outburst, which I greatly needed to release in helping to clear my mind and ease my aching heart. I have to do that from time to time, especially when it is around very difficult days that cause me to Reflect and  Remember so much of the past.

I am thankful for such kind friends in their encouraging words of support, helping me to push and pull through the thickness of it all. Am I a complete and utter failure from all that has transpired these past 5 years? No, I know that I am not. But I do know that there are obvious things that I can do better, and yet there are things that have already happened that I can not change. With those certain things I am trying to be at peace, for what is done is done, and have the courage to admit that I am not perfect and continue to move forward. I am not the best example of courage and faithfully fulfilling the duties and responsibilities that are given or more entrusted to me. I think about when your siblings are older and looking back at these hard times for our family, will they feel that I have given them a example of hope when things are hard from them, or will I just have caused more disturbances on their heart and mind to deal with later?? Gosh I truly hope that I can change and do better, in helping them to be successful here and now. For that is where we are, so that is truly where my focus and heart needs to be, to be here for them because I can.

There was something pretty profound that Elder Eyring in the 1st Presidency of the church of Jesus Christ said, "You choose to leave an Inheritance of Hope to those who might follow your example."
Those that come to my mind immediately when I think of an Inheritance of Hope are the Mormon Pioneers. They did not "have" to face hunger, fatigue, or even death as they crossed the plains, but they yielded to such unfavorable circumstances to receive the promise of Zion. Where they could have religious freedom and a place to worship their Lord their God, in they way they were guided and directed.
Also I think of Our Savior, Jesus Christ as he prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane. There he prayed to God asking for the bitter cup to be removed from him, that he would not have to drink it. But then He yielded to such unfavorable circumstances drank the cup, therefore giving mankind HOPE in this world and in the next.

I know what I need to do, but it is not easy. Elder Eyring also said, "Our duties and responsibilities must sometimes be difficult because their purpose is to move us along the path to our eternal home." If this is my goal, and our family's goal, then it is time to put on my courage face on and strive to be that example of Hope that I want to be, and choose to continue to follow the footsteps of my utmost favorite example of Inheritance of Hope.

"... Because Adam and Eve did fall, we have temptations, trials, and death as our universal inheritance. However, our loving Heavenly Father gave us the gift of His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ, as our Savior. That great gift and blessing of the Atonement of Jesus Christ brings a universal inheritance: the promise of the Resurrection and the possibility of eternal life to all who are born."

I am thankful for the greatest of all blessings of God- Eternal Life. I know that this promise will be ours, I just hope that in the mean time as I am waiting for these glorious promises to be fulfilled that my face of courage can stay constant and permanent and not easily be removed... but I am working on that, I guess that is why I am still here.

How we LOVE you Caleb! Keep pulling for us, how we need you, oh how we always need you! Love Love and More Love For You. Love Your Mommy