Second Month, Still Tremendously Hard.....

Oh Sweet Caleb,
How do we do this without you? To not see your sweet face each morning, hear your kind voice, laugh with you as you giggle hysterically. So many things we have taken for granted thinking, "Oh we will do that tomorrow, tomorrow we will get to that, tomorrow we will go to that place you want to go." Nothing shakes you more then coming to the understanding that all we really do have is today! Why did we just assume that tomorrow would come? Our hearts hurt so much, this pain is so hard to bear. Honestly how can one move on from such a hard blow, with having you here with us, then with just a blink of an eye you are not. Here we are on the second month from the terrible accident, and yet it feels SO much longer then that. Making us sick to our stomachs to think how SLOW time on earth goes. We pray each day that the millennium will come quickly, to ease our heartache and so many others grief and pain as well. Each day I wake up and say "Are you kidding me I have to do another day...." I know the millennium maybe longer than we want but, I know the Lord will answer the righteous desires of one's heart. So we will pray on, hope on, and move on as best as we can. Knowing that we move on not to forget, but we move on to keep you alive with us, your memories, your life, your spirit. Why do parents have to loose their little children, we may never really know, but we know that the Lord does. And why did he give this hard challenge to us, we may never know, but we know that the Lord does. And for this we will trust in him, because he does know the bigger picture, Thank goodness. All I can say is that, I know that I will have all sorts of questions for him to answer when I see him. And for you sweet Caleb I still think you cut in line and for that I still think you should get a spanking when I get home. However, Liahona is good to remind me that it wasn't your fault that you left, but that the Lord needed you, so I should not spank you. =) You two, my Irish Twins were always looking out of each other, and I have a feeling you still will.
We love you so much and miss you so much, that it hurts to breathe. Please stay close to us, we still need you.
Love Your Mommy

Memories:

Tamara remembers that Caleb would always ask, "Who wants to play soccer with me?"

Liahona remembers that Caleb would always say, "When are we going to the library?" (Because he would want to check out a new computer game or recheck out one of his favorite library computer games.)

Mom (Tanya) remembers how much Caleb loved the Nebraska bugs. He was always trying to capture and catch them. He would often catch bugs to make a bug zoo this summer. He and his best friend Dylan would make fliers and hang them up on lightposts to get people to come. Charging only 5cent per person, but mom paid them 25cent per person instead.

Dad (Eric) remembers how much Caleb loved to play Army Man Blackcat Attack game for the Fourth of July. He would often try to talk his dad into playing it throughout the year.

Caleb's Room

Pictures of Caleb's walls, they way he created them. His most loved things: His Savior Jesus Christ, the Prophet Thomas S. Monson, his Starwars posters, and his Transformers stickers. Plus a picture of his library books. He begged and begged to go to the library, and when I finally got around to it he was disappointed that they didn't have his favorite computer game, "Zoo Tycoon." We now have that game, in Honor our Sweet Caleb.